DISCOMBOBULATION…IS THAT EVEN A WORD?

national handbag dayHi ya Peeps and Happy Friday the 13th…dun dun dun!  I’m not superstitious at all, but do love me a good scary movie.  Friday The 13th was truly one of the best, a close second behind Halloween.  Or wait, perhaps it was When a Stranger Calls.  Click here for one of my favorite scenes. Well, it was when I was 16!   Doesn’t that take you back a few years? 

So, I’ve been busy trying to keep myself from climbing the walls as of late, feeling slightly discombobulated, so please bear with me.  And speaking of, here is one more silly thing. Happy Day after International Purse Day.  I can’t even grasp that this IS a day!  But my purses thank you and no,  I didn’t take them for a walk…Now let’s get serious, shall we?  😉

I’m slightly ticked at myself because I missed my deadline for the October Neighbors Magazine article due to a hectic August (ear surgery gone bad – don’t ask) and just a couple of other random things that messed up my timelines.  Out the window went all my calendaring and organizing tips.  Oh how we “bloggers” love to give sage advice to others, but following for ourselves is a bit of a farce!  I’m feeling off kilter… 

I feel I hibernated through the summer, only to wake up finding it October.  I found myself constantly checking the Weather network hoping for 3 days in a row of some hot sun. I’m typically brown as a berry till the first snow fly’s, but I’m already dousing myself in Bio Oil to keep what little shade of color I have left.  (It works for JLo, so why not). 

The one good thing I DO love about Fall is the wardrobe.  I love to break out my oversized sweaters, long boots, and flowy scarfs, but oh, hang on… again, we “bloggers” paint the picture, but this is the true reality!   

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Thanksgiving came and went.  I hardly even remember eating dinner with the family.  We work for days prepping the bird, setting the table, and when it’s time to eat, all you really want is to down a Jäger bomb.  AMIRITE?

This year we had a bit of a calamity as I was removing said bird out of the oven.  The tin foil pan collapsed (he tipped the scales at 22 lbs.), and I proceeded to spill turkey juices all over the hot oven, the floor, and my bare feet!  The smoke from the oven filled the room like some eerie Halloween thriller, and while my 88 year old father was busy flapping towels at the fire alarm to make it stop, my mama was busy swooshing her way through the kitchen collecting all the rolling potatoes and carrots.  It was quite a scene.  I HATE COOKING!  Did I mention that?  

I spent the next day binge watching This is Us, on Netflix.  I thought it would cheer me up after the great turkey escape, but nope, I only ugly cried my way through a bowl of chips and dip.  Three cheers for comfort food.  

The decision to head to Costco was also a big mistake.   I now had this internal struggle to deal with of Halloween vs. Christmas décor.  Why do they do this?   All I wanted was a pumpkin for my urn, but now I had to make a snap decision if I needed 350 more gift tags, or a giant Santa for my lawn.  Honestly, I can’t even find time to wax my brows these days, and they want me to be thinking holiday blow-ups?   I want my Mommy!    

So, I’ll end my mindless drivel here, but I could go on.  Mother Nature and her nasty ways has also decided it’s now time for me to enter the next phase of life called Perimenopause, complete with weight gain, mood swings, and hot flashes! The perfect trifecta!  Don’t even get me started.  As for today,  I’m busy sourcing disposable jammies on Amazon. 

Let’s call it a day, and save this story for another blog, shall we?   Until next time, xo

leslieann2

 

September One and A Bug’s Life Fun…

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Hi ya Gang,

September 1 – I really can’t get my head around that! I just opened the pool for gods sake! 😉  I know you are all busy trying to fit in that last bit of fun via the CNE, so I’ll try to keep this short!

NEWS FLASH – I bought a bug; a VW Bug Convertible, black and shiny.  I named her #Veronica. I hashtag her to make it more official.  Apparently dudes don’t name their cars, because the minute she arrived, I was mocked by all the men folk in my home.  All I can say is, I hope nobody ever wants to borrow #Veronica once they figure out how fun she can be.

I can’t put into words the pure joy I am having driving her around town, and as much as this all sounds a little cra cra, there is something so freeing about having the wind in your face, singing at the top of your lungs, and your hair blowing in the wind.   I do feel I want to wear a silk scarf like in the movies, “screen goddess, Grace Kelly..” but I think I’m more of a Bridget Jones kinda gal!  See for yourself….

That’s pretty much how I look when I arrive at work, but again, #messyhairdon’tcare.

I’ve been busy helping my middle boy pack up all his worldly belongings for his 4th and final year at college.  You think it gets easier, but we still have the same discussions over what to bring and what not to.  I feel at his age, popping Flintstone vitamins isn’t really appropriate and I’m most sure they are past the ‘best before” date.  Regardless, as much as I can’t wait to clean up things around his “living space”, I know I’ll still shed a wee tear for the boy.

We paid a visit to Staples last night, and did have a bit of a chuckle listening to all the parents screaming at their kids.  We were trying to get in and get out as quickly as possible, purchasing only a binder,  but I couldn’t help but laugh at the newbies there, list in hand, purchasing anything and everything to just get the hell out.   Then the fighting..” no, put that back, who uses tennis balls anymore…”;   “no, put that back, it’s too expensive, you don’t need 800 crayons..”, and my fav,  “Jesus Christ, just pick one, and let’s get going!”  You kiss your kids with that mouth?  It’s really a wonderful bonding time.. that “most wonderful time of the year.”

So speaking of back to school…here is my latest article from this months Sept. Issue of Neighbours Magazine ~ all about just that. Heading off to school, fall and time for scheduling.

cover september

 

I do hope Mother Nature decides to play nice so we can perhaps enjoy this last long weekend with some sunshine.  Good luck to all those heading off to school, young and old.  I’m outta here… my sweet ride awaits!

xo

sweet

Next week ~ Ride updates, and Poppin’ tags 🙂

July Musings…and in comes the August Long!

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August already ~ can you believe…it!   I’m having trouble describing in a few words how my July was… draining or exasperating come to mind.  That being said, I do hope your summer has been treating you well.  Gauging from all the FB & IG posts, it appears all cottages/pools are open, the sunrise/sunsets are fab and the “docktails” are flowing.  Things seem to be ok in my circle, so I’m happy about that, I really am.

Although, hang on, I  must admit, the video clips of your lakes, as the tide ebb’s and flows are difficult to watch,  while I sit spinning and twirling on my office chair, trying to figure out if I want to eat my lunch alone in my 6x 6 cube, or mosey on down to the cafe and join the masses.

Do I sound like a Grumpy Cat or what!  I will share that I am now in full on decompress mode after a somewhat stressful month at said office.

Here’s the lowdown ~  I survived yet another huge re-org which I must say, can damn near put one over the edge.  I was frazzled.  It’s really all too hard to explain, but I’ve managed to go through, I believe, 4 of these re-orgs, and watching people wandering the halls, all zombie like, is not fun, my friends.  It was just best to avoid eye contact for the month of July.  It was very difficult to say goodbye to some great people you have bonded with over the years, but life does goes on, and I wish them well.   ❤

So yes, time for some new beginnings, and some new changes for your truly, which I am pleased about.   I am now working with someone that has gone from calling me by my proper name Leslie-Ann, to Leslie, to Lester, to LA…  I’m in!  I never really put a lot of thought into how someone addresses me, but it really does make a difference.   I take comfort in the simple silly things in life.   I think men tend to give people nick names more often than women.  They abbreviate or change it up with the last name and turn it into something like PWilly, or for some strange reason add the word dog (DAWG) to it.  ODAWD, GDAWG  Men are strange… 😉

AAAAANyway,  when feeling grumpy,  you try to find something to make you smile.   I’m presently reading an absolutely hilarious novel given to me by one of my good friends from Atlanta.  Her timing was bang on.  She knows the author personally, so that intrigued me even more.

It’s titled Mr. Right-Swipe, and if you are searching for that great beach read, this is your baby!  I hope to one day meet this funny lady in person, but for now will try and show her some love by sharing over social media.  Starting in Chapter 1, you will be looking up some specific acronyms.  I thought I knew most, but clearly need to up my coolness factor.  By the time you hit Chapter 7, you will be feeling the need for a cigarette and a cool drink…just sayin’.  *blush*   Please do me a solid, and grab yourself a copy here!

mrrightswipe

Well Done Ricki!

On the writing front, I have been on again, off again.  I keep changing my narrative to suit my mood.   I think that’s ok.  As I learned in my writing class, we write with fervor, and edit at leisure.  I have a lot of editing to do, but that’s ok.  I think this is how many start out.  I need a personal assistant to follow me around, keep notes for me, and then magically one day, BAM, my best seller!  Oh, I live to dream.  I also dream of one day swimming with pigs, so how’s that for a little insight into my personality!  Who knows, I may even get a publishing gig before my 80th birthday.

Aside from writing and editing, I am enjoying the wee articles I have been doing for Neighbours Magazine, where just 350 words seems so easy peezy now, AND, up’s my popularity in my neighborhood ten fold… 😉

august neighbors

AUGUST BANTER…!

Lastly, if you have been seeing any of my Instagram pics, you will know that I have signed up for The Ride to Conquer Cancer NEXT June.   Most days, I’m pumped, but at times, the fear of God sets in.  “Those hills will kill you Leslie…”  Well, quite frankly, I want to learn to ride those hills properly so I can rock an ass you can bounce a quarter off …Is that so wrong?

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Half way Point/Pint  Joke Cred: HillsForsyth

I was reminded that beers are for when you have completed the training ride, but in my mind, if you stop at a road side cafe, and it’s open and serving alcohol, why the hell not! I’ve got my Fitbit permanently secured on my wrist and it’s doing a wonderful job of keeping me on track.  I was on it like a hobo on a ham sandwich once I figured out all it could do for me.

So that’s my July in a nut shell.  I won’t bore you how my car failed me on the highway, and I had to have it towed, and now in search of a new car ~  or that I almost had to come to blows with a local grocery manager,  because my parenting skills came into question!!!  Really?   Deep breath… in with the good air, out with the bad!

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Good-bye Vanilla Ice!

I clearly cannot wait for my own wee summer getaway,  leaving today… Not gonna lie, will be indulging in a few docktails of my own, a few dock dance parties, and of course,  the odd libation with an umbrella in it!  (Hopefully the only Umbrella I will need… Arrgh).

Enjoy the rest of the summer, and I’ll check back in come September!  Thanks for listening…

Cheers & Happy Long Weekend,

LA 🙂

in drink
Summer 2017 – Safety First ❤

BLOGIVERSARY and Bloggy Tidbits…

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Oh Joy.  I can finally celebrate something.  I’m also over this horrible lingering 6 week nagging flu/cough/cold.  Happy to report, I’m all better! I spent way too many days propped up with pillows and spent too much time reading and writing…and eating.  My family can also now remove the sneeze guard from the kitchen counter.  That thing was most annoying! 😉

It’s not that I don’t like doing any of the above, but when you spend most of it coughing up a lung, it’s not fun.  I almost needed my poor hubby to perform the Heimlich on me last weekend.  We were out for a lovely breakfast when some undercooked bacon lodged in the back of my throat.  I started to turn strawberry red, and because of my cough, couldn’t get any air.  I felt my last breath on earth was going to be taken over my Grand Slam feast!

I’m almost certain I need a new rib cage as mine had taken a beating.  Belly laughing was not an option.  It’s also been raining kittens and puppies, which just kept me in a state of resting bitch face.  On the upside, our lawn has never looked better and was contemplating shipping in some Billy Goats to help with the upkeep.

So yes, it’s my Blogiversary.  Don’t worry.  I don’t need flowers or candy. That’s not how I roll.  I do however think we should celebrate with a cocktail or two ~ yes, that’s how I roll.  Let’s leave it at that.  Anything worth celebrating should always be accompanied with alcohol.  And speaking of booze….

…in total darkness, she maneuvered herself up the antiquated staircase, knowing full well, that in her current state, the dodging of the creaking floorboards would be more than she could manage.  She allowed herself one little giggle, enjoying this game, before the flash of the bright bulb overhead, sent her catapulting down the staircase… (sneak peak)…

So yes, I’m writing… and who knew I would still be at this 5 years later.  My earlier blogging days consisted more of me writing the odd blog, and then stopping for life things that got in the way and then restarting when the mood struck.

My writing, (“hmmmph!  Listen to her, like she is some kind of writer…”)  was started well before Blogging websites or Social Media.   I started writing when my 3 boys were small but sadly, I had lost the floppy disc on that creation, so had to start over.. (dating myself  is hysterically funny sometimes).   I do know however, it had a great working title, and believe me, I have goggled the bejesus out of it, and still mine for the taking if I want it.

I have been enjoying my writing class, and getting a lot of ideas and helpful hints on how to progress.  Plot, Theme, Character’s.  Last class we went on a field trip to the church basement.  I know, hold yourself down,  but it is amazing how one gets a different perspective of looking at something when you know you have to write about it.  I had Jesus eye balling me at every turn, so I wanted to make this a good one.  I think we can all agree he is probably the best editor in the business.   Can I get an AMEN!

I’ve also been trying to get my blog website updated, so you will see it under construction from time to time. I have been following a blogger that I adore. She is so great at what she does.  She has a huge following, but is always happy to help out us rookies.  She is helping me up my game on the social media front and shares many helpful hints on how to change things up.  She has a HUGE following and actually talks to lil’ ol’ me!

Another blogger told me she likes my blog just the way it is, and not to mess it up with too much drivel – less is more she says. I totally agree.  I think I have a #girlcrush!

I’m also still having a ton of fun writing articles for Neighbors of Olde Oakville/Joshua Creek, but must admit, what I love even more, is when my #girlgang snaps a pic of the article for me, before I’ve even got a copy!  I adore them.  We’ve been throwing  around some ideas about a podcast or perhaps mounting a go-pro in my car.  Not sure about that idea.  Fuzzy slippers and writing here (where you can’t see me), has it’s benefits.

I have more stories to tell, and a few updates coming your way.  In the mean time, I’m still on the look out for the brain cells I lost while in the infirmary.  I’ll follow the breadcrumbs to try and figure out where I left them, but most importantly, ponder what happens to that girl that flew down the staircase.   If you want, tell me, and I’ll use it! (interaction with your readers is also a fun thing to do, so I’m told).

Until next time – I’m off to pop a cork and have some fun!

Yours in writing & Laughing & Smiling….

smile

 

Writing 101 & Working Through The Fiscal…

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With another Easter in the books, it’s now time to focus on my last quarter.  It seems as though I run my household like a business.  I’m now in Q4 like my work family calendar,  with April being the start.  Most of April is being kind to us, with goodness coming in the form of sunshine, patios, and hopefully for me, a few getaways.

Given I was just informed I still have 6 holiday days that I must take before the end of our “work fiscal,” I now have to think of something to do, somewhere to go… NYC is on my mind.  Not too far for a road drive, and I love everything BIG APPLE!  Any overnight excursions you could recommend would be welcome. I prefer road trips as of late, so please keep that in mind when planning my agenda!

So on another note, a couple of things have happened and wanted to share….

Well, for one, this…

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Picking up my son from college for the summer, and within moments, smarty pants had me on his “snapchat” story…

Arrgh, that sinking feeling you get, when you see the lights flashing, knowing full well they are for you!  I was told I should have said I was driving with the flow of traffic, but I didn’t really feel like messing with Mr. Policeman.  Authority scares me.  I just flashed a smile, and didn’t bother engaging in any witty banter. (Oh, but I was tempted).   He seemed so nice, $63 nice. He explained that it should have been higher, yadda yadda yadda. OK, I got it… just hand me the ticket, and let me get home to my cold beer!

The second more exciting; less traumatic piece of news I have to share, is that I began my new writing class last Monday.  I have always wanted to get this ‘kickstarted’ so a lovely friend sent me a suggestion.  I jumped on it, and so glad I did.  I registered without hesitation.  Brian Henry is the teachers name, and you can read all about him and what he does here.  Brian Henry’s – Creative Writing ~ Quick Brown Fox

Before my first class, as any other 53 woman does, I went school supply shopping!  And, of course, found the perfect Journal to begin my storytelling! 🙂  How great is this… my journal collection continues.

unfinished

Never a truer word spoken…

 

So, I was late for class… *badfirstimpression*  but he did like my journal! 🙂

I walked in to find 14 other people introducing themselves, and sharing their stories.  I made sure I was very clear that I am NOT A WRITER, but hoping that this class can turn me into the next Sandra Brown (before she got all smutty, with naughty sex scenes). We were all checking each other out, and like anybody does, you start guessing what everyone’s true story is and of course, who I will sit with at recess.

We played a game to try and remember everyone’s name ~ I was given Lucky Leslie.  Let’s hope so!  Perhaps a little foreshadowing. Lucky in the form of a book deal! Ha! She laughs.. third person, first person.  arrgh..so much to learn!

We were then given the task to write two fortune cookies with a short inspirational point and then turn them over to to someone else, to write a short piece.   Immediately, my heart sank.  It was like a small exam to me.  Now I had to channel my inner writer, which at this point, was more concerned about whether or not we were going to have to share with the class.  I’m a rookie. Not ready for an official “reading” quite yet.  Writing here is easy.  Nobody is looking at me.  I may sit at the back of the class next time.

I cannot wait for my second class.   He shared with us some books that others have written (having been in his class), so I’m very hopeful!

He has given us all some very helpful hints, including giving ourselves permission to write a shitty 1st draft, but a few stuck out for me.

 Write with fervor; revise at leisure…

puke it out; mop the mess tomorrow

Don’t have Stage Fright

This is good news, because I do tend to write with fervor, and revise/edit to the point, where I think nobody would really read this drivel anyway.  It’s nice to know, I’m perhaps on the right track.

I will keep you all updated on my progress, but for now, I have some homework to catch up on.  Dear Diary….

Yours in writing & travel,

leslieann2